Tuesday, April 23, 2013


I've been in a weird mood these days. A lot of things have all decided to come up. School, work, life in general. Decisions that I know I need to make but don't seem to be easy to do so. 

Funny what happens when we become adults.

I thought by this point I would have things figured out. I didn't imagine I would still be going to school, still unsure of where I am going. Is this the right thing, I wouldn't think that it would be so damn hard to get a degree. I met adults that did it, and I thought so could I. But what they won't tell you is the colleges half the time are not catered to the working adult, which I knew but still. They won't tell you that some of the classes aren't offered for years in between leaving the student with no other option but to wait it out for an entire semester. I have 7 classes to go before I graduate. But these 7 classes seem to be the hardest to come by....I will have to wait another semester once more. Is it even worth it? Should I try and look for an online school, even if I really really don't want to? I was so proud that I got into the school I wanted to go to all those years ago. And by just closing the door on it feels a lot like I am giving up on it.

 But then again, do I have any other choice?

My work is work. I will not get into specifics nor bitch to much about it. All I will say is things are changing around here, and I am trying to understand where I fit in the new picture they have. Or if I even do at all? And if not, what the hell do I do about that one.  It seems half the people I know are looking for other positions and very few of them have been successful at it. I am thankful I have a job, I should be thankful. But sometimes I wonder if there is more than this.

There are other matters, family, babies and the potential thought of moving, which keeps playing in the back of our minds. 

Yes, moving. 

Which brings me to the whole crossroads. If we are contemplating moving, and we aren't talking about just down the street but out of state, do I even want to take things into consideration. New job, new school. I feel as though we are at the point in things where if we are even toying with the idea then maybe the best idea is to stick it out until we determine if that is going to happen.

The Gemini in me, is laughing.
And saying.

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