Tuesday, December 30, 2008

So how am I to end 2008? Being sick more in likely. While at my parents over the weekend, I managed to pick up my sisters colds. Yep....I found my way into work this morning since this was to be the only day this week I would be working in the office. I felt like shit. I truly did. I still do. This makes for the third time since being pregnant that I have had a cold.

I am looking forward to the day I can take medicine again. I try to remind myself its not that far off. But you try telling my nose that at the moment, I bet it would disagree with you. The relief it would say, can not come soon enough.

But being that its the holiday weeks, and its a rather slow week at work, well I suppose it came at a good time. After all no one is in the office and if they are they pretty much stick to themselves, coming and going as they please.

A blessing in disguise I suppose.

Thursday, December 25, 2008

Merry Christmas. May it be a joyous occasion for all and may all get everything their hearts desire!

Enjoy the season!

Wednesday, December 24, 2008

Hard to believe, but Christmas is tomorrow! In most of the country, it looks like it may be a white Christmas, and if not. It is certainly a cold one. And as usual, today is spent with Andy's family while tomorrow after we share our own gifts, we will be heading over to my parents to share the holidays with that side.

Still, its amazing to think that its Christmas...Seriously where did this month or even year go!

Monday, December 22, 2008

After much waiting, a lot of trouble and a lot of fustration, we finally got the call our baby furniture had come in. To understand the whole mess, you have to be informed of the mess. You see, after dealing with Babies R Us, where we initially registered for the crib set, they informed us that our set was being 'discontinued' and we would have to find another. We went through their inventory three times and were told again, three other times that the sets we liked were no longer avaliable. And in fact handed been in stock, and avaliable since well back into the spring. Fustrated we searched through several different chain stores, until we came across a local small business my mother had suggested. After the pain of Babies R Us, we were relieved to find an incredible set that both Andy and myself loved. Ordering it in the beginning of November they said would guarantee us it delievery before the end of the year, but more in likely sooner since its a popular set and they get shipments in weekly.

So we wait, and we wait. We swing by every now and then to pick up some other things for the kiddo and what not. We ask, and they always said we will call you on Monday to let you know the status, but it should be here the week of Thanksgiving.

Thanksgiving came. Thanksgiving left.
Still no set. And no call to even update us like they had said.

We order a rocker, and we check, they inform us its on the next truck, and that again they will call us on Monday.

Still no call.

Knowing we aren't due til February we didn't mind waiting. But it would have been nice for a call, after all they promised they would call.

So we went in there two weekends ago and they said it was on the next truck, and that once again they would call on Monday, and Monday passed with no phone call. Andy decided to call up there to inquire.

He got the run around, and was told that we were high demand customers who were bitchy because we were pregnant and how they now had to go out of their way to please us, just because we couldn't wait.

Andy was pretty upset.

All we wanted was a phone call when they told us they would call.

They finally called us, in a not so pleasent way last Friday told us it was ready and to come pick it up. Andy and my dad excitetly-or not so-went and picked it up, rushed home and set the entire thing up in less than a half hour.

While the room is currently a mix of baby toys, blankets and Andy's hockey memoriabilia which will soon be moved. And our rocker is still on order.

We are thrilled to say, things are coming together nicely.

And this 'bitchy, high demanding pregnant woman' is happy.

For now.

Friday, December 19, 2008

there are times, when people can shock the living shit out of you.and usually its not from people you would think. take for instance my sister in law matt and kate (andys bro/sisnlaw) went to the hockey game last night in honor of kate's birthday. and as always he went down to meet them at the seats before the game. so they start talking and kate says

'i got to say, aleisha is the most beautiful pregnant woman i have ever seen. its actually quite disgusting."

now kate has been through two children already. she filled out in a lot of areas, that i have yet to. i dont know why its different but it is. anyway i took this as a huge compliment, especially coming from her. it was just so unreal and so shocking. i didnt know what to say when andy told me this. i just wanted i dont know. but i wanted to do something. i dont think i have been that complimented in awhile.

and i will say i never thought myself to be that pretty.

my office is extremely dead today. i dont know if people are already leaving town for the holidays, or its just me. or what the deal is. my boss is working from home, his daughter is sick so he had to. and there is only three of us in our group that are actually in the office.

and me?
im ready to pack it in and call it a day.

im just so tired. i didnt sleep really well last night, my stomach was just in knots. i dont know if it was a case of braxton hicks or if it was something i ate for dinner that wasnt agreeing with me or what but it was just not comfy...i think the last time i looked at the clock it was about two in the morning.

i need to go grab me those cute earrings i saw the other day, and so instead of heading out here a little later, i think i am going to try and slide out o here a little bit early so i can have enough energy to walk around the mall while i wait for andy to finish for the day.

as for tonights plans. well seeing that we finally got our baby furniture in, we need to pick it up. my dad is helping with that one, so tonight i think we are just going to play it simple and do some cleaning. i need to finish some shopping eventually but figured i could do it tomorrow or on sunday or something. thhis of course will all depend entirely on how i am feeling. its amazing i could be filled with live and energy one moment, and dead to the world the next.

Tuesday, December 9, 2008

sometimes its the hardest thing to do. the waiting. waiting to live. waiting to go. waiting to die. or just waiting. currently, we are playing just that when it comes to my grandmother. they started her on morphine yesterday saying it wasn't going to be much longer. my grandfather has gone to the church to talk about arrangements. he says he just wants her to die already. i am sure this is how he is coping even if i think it is utterly ridiculous of a thing to say to the women. about the woman who has been his wife for more than sixty years.

but we have all been warned, it wont be to much longer. my mom says it wouldnt surprise her if she doesnt last another five days.

my father, got up this morning at four thirty looking at the closet.

"do you think i need a new suit?" he asked my mom.
"you have a few honey."
"i know.its just. i don't know what to do." he shakes his head and goes to work.

i cant stand these moments. when you feel so utterly helpless and alone. wishing there was something more you could do. something more you could say. and yet you know there isn't anything anyone can do. or say. for what more is there?

i wish i could comfort my dad more. i haven't seen him cry very often. if i count it, its maybe three. the time he read my piece, and the time he walked me down the aisle. thats two. its just so sad. my heart breaks for him especially.

if you don't know already. i am close to my dad. i am truly my father's daughter out of the three he has.

whats worse? i have an exam tonight. my last until august. and im sitting her thinking how the hell am i going to take it the way i am right now? its worth 150 points. out of a thousand. that isnt to bad. so i will go. and i will try my damndest to actually get a decent grade. because i owe it to everyone to do so. if not for myself, for my grandmother. for my father.

waiting.for something.
the unknown.to happen.

Friday, December 5, 2008

i hate studying.

for an exam on a saturday morning is that much more horrible.

Wednesday, December 3, 2008

Its an interesting thing. Being thirty weeks pregnant. I would like to think, and say that I am now more than halfway through, after all I barely have ten weeks to go before the big day is allegedly supposed to come. Ten weeks-give or take-until I get to see our precious little boy.

Amazing huh?

Awhile ago, on our baby blog I posted things people have said. But that was the beginning. And since I have gained so much time, well here is a new things of stupid things people have said. Or done that I find absolutely annoying, or rude.

1. 'so when are you disappearing?"
'when the baby decides to come. really i don't have a lot of control over that.'
'and how long will you be gone?'
'around 10 weeks. give or take. depending on how things go.'
'ten weeks?'
'that's what i said.'
'i guarantee you, unless you have surgery. you'll be so bored, you'll be back at work within a week.'
'no ten weeks.'
'you are taking maternity leave then. fair enough.'
-coworker this morning. i may add he is single and looking ladies! any offers?

2. i get on the metro this morning, i don't expect for anyone to give up their seat for me. Even if I am disabled and pregnant I know we don't live in a perfect world where people respect the signs or anything. But I am standing there. My ever growing belly sticking out like a sore thumb. everyone ignores me and pay attention to their papers. When someone gets up, another woman grabs the seat. She looks at me and smiles, and then thanks me for allowing her to sit! It isn't until two stops before my own that someone offers me a seat. Mind you, this is 45 minutes after I first stepped on to the train.

3. 'are you sure your not having twins.'
'i'm sure.'
'i swear you are.'
'why? do i look that big?'
'well...no. i mean.'
'remember i was a size 0-2 before pregnant.'
'its just that.'
'its just you think im that huge.'
'no, i say that to every pregnant woman.'
i just look at him.
'oh look i gotta go catch the bus.'
good thinking, i was about ready to hand him a shovel and to tell him to start digging.
-this is the same coworker from the previous stupid comment.

4. 'you like cucumbers on your sandwiches.'
'must be a pregnant thing.'
'must be an aleisha thing, i have always enjoyed them.'
'no its a pregnancy thing. you never had them before.'
'we don't go to places for sandwich together very often.'
'still it's got to be a pregnancy thing.'
(because everything is a pregnant thing now right?)

5. 'so what are you naming the kid.'
'not officially sure.'
'any thoughts.'
'you going to share?'
'whats your name?'
'then its michael stephen craig robert patrick carey matthew elijah elliott yorkshire mattice'
'why not?'
-random coworker on the way down the elevators.

Tuesday, December 2, 2008

My grandmother doesn't seem to be doing well at all. Hospice has agreed to come in and take over to help aide my grandfather, who can't take care of his wife anymore. Its a sad thing, knowing they are there. While it is for her benefit and to help her out, at the same time, you know this has to be the end. Or at least the beginning of the end. I say this, only because hospice came in the aid of my grandfather tate during his last few months on earth. my aunt, says she doesn't think this is true, that my grandmother can get better and will once again thrive but if you saw her. The state of her, you would know otherwise. She is down to just about 70 pounds. she isn't eating anymore and she is barely moving. In a lot of ways, I think she has made her peace with things and is just waiting. i say that when she is done and when she is ready she will decide its time to let go. whether that may be tomorrow or next month only time will tell.

but i do say, it isn't easy. knowing that we could very well be down to the last few times with her. its hard to remember her the way she was once upon a time. decades ago, when she was so alive and so happy. if you saw her today, you wouldn't recognize her. she is barely the grandmother i remember. it is so sad.

while i am not a truly religious person. i believe in god. i believe in the afterlife and a much better place than the one here on earth. but because i am not very spiritual. this next part may surprise one.

but the only thing i do ask is that the lord help her during this time of her life. may he guard her and take her under his wing and guide her into the transition. may he let her go peacefully and without pain.

and may he welcome her with open arms when she decided to part from earth, and rise into heaven.

because from here on out, she is in the lords hand.

Monday, December 1, 2008

Welcome to December my friends. Are we ready for the happiest 25 days of the year? Or so it is to be? I for one love the holidays so I am thrilled that this time of year is around.

Started shopping over the weekend, no where near done but its a start which is better than some I may say.

I need to start Andy. Still trying to figure out just exactly what I want to get him. I have ideas. Plenty of movies and what not, but other than that, well right now I can think of things I want to get him but its called you need money to do that.

Not that we are in dire need of that. We are believe it or not ok. Still if I could spend my little heart out on him I would.

And to think, today is cyber monday, and ask me how many gifts I have bought.