Monday, June 4, 2012

Slipping through my fingers...

Yesterday morning our bedroom door opens quietly.  I peep out of one eye to find my son standing there in the doorway. Believing we are asleep-which yes technically we were.-he closes it again. When it opens for the third time I motion him in, and offer him to curl up next to me. Anderson is snoring beside me, and so its just me and this little man in the early morning dawn.

I lay there as I rub his back, and feel his own tiny hands clutch my back and copy my movements. He kisses my nose and then cheek. He begins to sing the same song I sing to him when he is upset. It is so simple, and so sweet and its just so loving. Its one of my favorite moments.

I know what the experts will tell me. I know they would say in instances, the moment he first opened that door I should have marched him back to his bedroom put him in bed and closed the door.

But what the experts won't tell you, is that those moments when its just you and the little man, lying in bed. Well its not going to last forever. He won't want to always snuggle. He won't always want to be this sweet little boy who wants to hold his mommy's hand and tell her she is his best friend.

And he won't always sit there in the middle of the restaurant and Anderson is teaching him how to wink to the pretty girls. And when he tells him to wink to the next pretty girl, he turns to me and winks. When I am in shock. He smiles and says..

'I'm not winking at any pretty girl mommy, I am winking at you. My pretty mommy.'

I know 15 years from now this line won't be used on me, unless he wants something. No. This line will be used for his next girlfriend. His pretty mommy, will be the old mommy....the thought kind of scares me.

He won't want to play Batman and Robin and let you pick out his outfits.. He won't come running to the door when you come in from work, wrap his arms around you and smoother you with kisses until you can stand no more.

No he won't want to do any of this. And while you think you have years and years until all of this happens. Those years, tend to sneak up on you faster than you could imagine. Before you know it, he won't be that little boy crawling into bed with you to snuggle at 5:30 in the morning. Believe me, you may think it sucks to lose an extra hour of sleep. But before you know he is going to be that teenager who won't want to see the hours before two in the afternoon. 

So the experts, can save their advice.  I will keep mine.

1 comment:

Jessica @ Confessions of a Former Undomestic Goddess said...

This is such a sweet post. It sounds like you share a lot of beautiful moments with your son; moments that you'll be able to cherish for years to come. Experts can offer advice, but only a mother truly knows how to care for her own child.

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