In full mode.

I stood there, in aisle 3, somewhere between Toy Story 3 and Cars party supplies staring at a thousand little add ons to make the perfect party that much more incredible. And my first thought was.

What the hell have I gotten myself into?
Really was this such a good idea? I mean he is 2, or will be in a week. Does he really need to hand out goody-bags? Did they even do that anymore?

My husband had taken the birthday boy off, running up and down aisles grabbing things, that weren't even on the list. He came flying down aisle 3, looking all proud of himself exclaiming he had found this best thing ever.

'And what about these? And these?' He shoves things in my face left and right. Streamers, birthday cupcake holders, and even something that resembled a baby carriage where among the items.None of which was anything that I had in mind. 'Umm dear, he is going to be 2.'

He just stares at me.
Clearly he had never thrown a birthday party before.

Not that I didn't appreciate the effort and I am sure most women would be over the moon if there husband was absolutely willing to help. But I have things in mind, I know what I want it to look like, how I wish it to be. And little baby carriages aren't exactly it.

You may ask, then what exactly is? I am no perfectionist, but I want it to be as close to perfect as I can, I look in these magazines, and on random blogs and I think, that, that is exactly what I want . And baby carriages weren't in it. I envision, balloons, and army men. Cool alien cupcakes and a barrel of monkeys. I envision several happy little boys running around our three story townhouse having a blast, not caring if we weren't going to playing games, because at 2 I don't think they will last long enough for games.

And toys, lots and lots of toys.

Of course, envisioning it is one thing, pulling it off is another. After all those blogs, and the websites are usually run by professionals. Either that, or by moms who have had several years of practice with this sort of thing.

Neither of which I am.

So with this picture in my head I stood there a little while longer, in aisle 3, planting, figuring and envisioning what my perfect birthday party for my son would be. Knowing that it may not be exactly right, or the picture perfect idea I have in my head.

But damn if I won't get it as close to it as I can.